Good night, sweet dreams.

I can still remember that night, even over 5 years later...

That day, nothing special happened. I went, as usual, to all my classes, slept and didn't worked much during classes, and when I finally got home, just sat in front of computer and played or got on the web. But if the day was normal, the night was totally the opposite. Around the time of 10 PM, I went to my bed. I layed down there, looking at the ceiling, while dreaming and having my usual thinking and relax time.

I fastly fell asleep compared to my usual nights, only took about 30 minutes before the night took me into her dark and mystical depths, like the Death takes off a man from everything he hated, setting him free from all the world's hatred and sadness. All I could remember for the first night were some images flashing into my head, at the flash of light it seemed to me to see undefined images, just flashes of different colors. I knew they had a meaning, but everything happened so fastly, and I was so dizzy that nothing flashed to me at that time, and still now I can't remember them clearly enough to give a description of them. But what truly matters is the second part of the night. The parts were easily identifiable, since between them, I had a small moment where I actually had my full reason. In this moment, it was already 3:30 AM. Before I had the time to actually realize what time it was, I was sleeping.

The second part of that night, which actually was holding the second dream of my entire life between its hands, lasted 1 minute 14.5 seconds to me. The 74.5 happiest seconds of my life, if not the only ones where I actually was happy. It was one of the simplest dream someone could ever have, but it still stoned me, and touched me forever.


I was there, somehow standing in the middle of the dark, feeling compressed, like if the darkness themselves were trying to suffocate me. Even though it was just a dream, I couldn't yet realize it, and for a single second, a second that lasted days to me, i was watching myself slowly dying, suffocating. As soon as my last breathe was brutally took off me, at the last moment of that single second, the dream really started.

I was standing there, on a platform, while a fountain at my right was running as a waterfall, down through the other platforms, which the next one was about 4 meters down there. I couldn't count the number of platforms, since they were going until the skyline, which I could barely see. Looking around, I realized I wasn't in the nature, but in what looked like a amazingly big building. The ceiling was infinite, going so far that I didn't knew if the stars I could see were painted on the ceiling or actually real stars behind a glass ceiling. Then, I realized I was holding someones hand. I turned my head to see who's hand I was holding, and got stoned for a second. It was the prettiest girl I had ever seen of my life. For a second, my heart totally stopped beating. My brain was rushing, where was this, where am I, how did I get there? I was about to wake up when that angel directly coming for the heaven smiled to me. All my questionings went to void, and I smiled at my turn. The love emanates from all her body, and I immediately understood. How could I forget for half a second? Of course, it was my love, which I mysteriously couldn't remember the name. We both looked at the platform, 4 meters underneath, and jumped at the same time, still holding each other's hand.

The gravity was almost at zero, and we both knew it. We softly touched the ground, sharing that passion for the flight, mysterious activity which was reserved to birds. We repeated the jump again and again, for what could seem hours, but which only lasted 45 seconds. Then we arrived at the last platform already. I was at least 12 meters down. She was scared, and holded my hand harder. A simple look from me convinced her there was no danger. For about five seconds, we looked at each other, words being useless to express our love. There was enough to explain the world in her blue mirror-like eyes, which were shining like they never did before. Then, without stopping watching each other, we jumped. It lasted 10 whole seconds, where we were in the air, almost flying, and where she gave me a hug. We surprisingly touched the ground as softly as the past platforms, even though this one was 3 times higher. Finally reaching the bottom of the waterfall, we realized that the walls were ending here, and that a shiny forest was stretching beyond. In the waterfall, the life was present in every particle of water.
Fifity-six seconds were already gone in this mystical world.

After reaching the end of the platforms, we looked at each other. For a second and half, we were looking at each other. We got closer to each other. During that time, our hearts synchronized, our both brains made one. We were completing each other, both filling holes in the other, filling the hatred, the sadness by our own person, and for half a second, we reached the Utopian feeling state.
Fifty-seven seconds and a half already passed.

After this, we looked at each other. I couldn't know if I was actually looking at her, or looking at me from her eyes, and it didn't mattered at all. Our breathes were blending into one, creating pure energy between us two. The life was being created. For 5 seconds, which didn't lasted long enough to me, I admired her face. All I can remember five years later are her ocean blue eyes, where I was drown in love, as long as her smile which couldn't ever fade, and her pale soft skin, which I probably won't forget of my entire life. Then, I seen my hand (or was it hers? I couldn't make the difference) rise to try to attain her cheek. Two seconds passed while I was watching that hand, wishing it could touch her face, have the feeling of my hand touching her skin. Finally, it reached it. For half a second, I was actually touching her skin, having not only inner sensations, but one of my most realistic sense was used inside the dream, as a summer breeze slowly cherishes you in moments where you'd never thought it could. Then, the unavoidable happened. Our mouths got closer, and we kissed for 4 seconds, which, in another dimension, probably reached years, if not centuries. Then, I got pulled off this Utopian dream, and for half a second, I cried, enough to wake up every single living thing in this universe.


I woke up in a total silence. For a fraction of second, I wished I could actually die, I thought that I couldn't live in this world without living this every single moment of my life. This dream acted like a drug, and totally addicted me, making me dependant of that incredible feeling, which I never thought could be possible. Then, I looked at the truth : it was only a dream. This untameable logic inside me took power once again, and I realized that if I could actually feel these things in my dreams, it meant that the brain could possibly generate such intense feelings, and that it could eventually restart someday.

Now, the only thing that keeps me alive is that dream. Because if the world, if the life can offer such feelings, I can't just end it that soon. Even though this world isn't going anywhere else then to the self-destruction, even though the ignorance is ruling the world more then it have ever done before, I am too lazy to act and help people to see the things as they are, to stop dreaming. I am now 14 years old, this dream happened when I was 9. My understanding of this world, my wisdom and intelligence surely isn't perfect, or even close to it, but is over the general people. I have only yet met 2 other people which wisdom and intelligence, as well as their feelings, touched me. That day was the last day of my life I had cried, as well as dreamt.

With the time, the face of that divine angel faded in my head. All I can now remember of her are her blue mirror-like eyes, as long as her never fading smile. Her nose, eyebrows, hairs, everything got destroyed with the time, the desert's wind removing any traces of its path there.

Your world surely is same as mine, but my world is the opposite of yours. I wish that I could actually write this in french, since I could express myself easier, but the English is the general language and I have to get used to it.

Thanks for reading my blog, and good night, but most important of all, sweet dreams.


Worlds Unbroken.
(If you want to see this video in high quality, please head to this link. Requires QuickTime)

I'm afraid it's been too long to try to find the reasons why
I let my world close in around a smaller patch of fading sky
But now I've grown beyond the walls to where I've never been
And it's still winter in my wonderland

I'm waiting for the world to fall
I'm waiting for the scene to change
I'm waiting when the colors come
I'm waiting to let my world come undone



I close my eyes and try to see the world unbroken underneath
The farther off and already it just might make the life I lead
A little more than make-believe when all my skies are painted blue
And the clouds don't ever change the shape of who I am to You

I'm waiting for the world to fall
I'm waiting for the scene to change
I'm waiting when the colors come
I'm waiting to let my world come undone
When I catch the light of falling stars my view is changing me
My view is changing me

I'm waiting...


Thanks to Sierra Lorna and the Dark Moon studios for the most amazing AMV I have ever seen.